The Lastlight Pilot Revision C

When Air Force Lieutenant Taylor Pierce begins experiencing vivid dreams of an ancient kingdom on the brink of war, he uncovers a betrayal at his secret Turkish base that blurs the line between his world and a prophesied realm where he is destined to wield a legendary light against an eternal evil.

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Overview

Poster
Unique Selling Point

The script blends elements of science fiction and fantasy in a unique way, exploring themes of identity, power, and the nature of reality. The juxtaposition of the modern military setting with the ancient, mystical world of Lurr creates a compelling contrast and raises intriguing questions about the interconnectedness of these seemingly disparate realms. The script's exploration of the Lastlight and its chosen heir, as well as the looming threat of Mordak, offers a fresh and engaging premise that would appeal to fans of both sci-fi and fantasy genres.

AI Verdict & Suggestions

Ratings are subjective. So you get different engines' ratings to compare.

Hover over verdict cards for Executive Summaries

GPT5
 Recommend
Gemini
 Consider
Grok
 Consider
DeepSeek
 Consider
Claude
 Consider
Average Score: 7.3
Key Takeaways
For the Writer:
To improve the script's craft, focus on clarifying the rules and mechanics of supernatural elements like the Lastlight and portals to make conflicts feel earned and less arbitrary. Additionally, streamline repetitive dream sequences by consolidating them into more purposeful, impactful moments that advance character development and plot, reducing audience fatigue and enhancing emotional resonance through tighter pacing and deeper character motivations.
For Executives:
The script has solid commercial value with its innovative blend of military thriller and high fantasy, offering broad appeal and serialization potential similar to hits like 'Stranger Things' or 'The Expanse.' However, risks include unclear world-building and pacing issues that could confuse audiences or inflate production costs, potentially limiting marketability unless refined, as the genre fusion might not land without strong clarity and engagement.
Story Facts
Genres:
Drama 55% Fantasy 40% Thriller 30% Action 20% Horror 15% Romance 10%

Setting: Modern day with elements of fantasy and historical flashbacks, Primarily set in Kovali, Turkey, and the fictional Kingdom of Lurr, with scenes in various mystical and military environments.

Themes: Destiny and the Chosen Ones, The Nature of Reality and Perception, Hidden Truths and Deception, Identity and Self-Discovery, Sacrifice and Duty, The Nature of Good vs. Evil, The Weight of the Past, Love and Loss

Conflict & Stakes: The main conflict revolves around Taylor's quest to uncover the truth about his friend Frank's situation, the supernatural threat posed by Mordak, and the political intrigue within the Kingdom of Lurr, with the stakes involving personal safety, loyalty, and the fate of the Lastlight.

Mood: Tense and suspenseful, with moments of mystical awe and emotional depth.

Standout Features:

  • Unique Hook: The integration of a supernatural element (Lastlight) with military and political drama.
  • Major Twist: The revelation of Peter's true parentage and the implications of his heritage.
  • Distinctive Setting: The contrasting environments of a bustling Turkish marketplace and a mystical kingdom.
  • Innovative Ideas: The use of dreams and visions to connect characters across time and space.
  • Unique Characters: A diverse cast with rich backstories and complex motivations.

Comparable Scripts: The Bourne Identity, Inception, The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, Game of Thrones (TV Series), The Dark Tower Series by Stephen King, The Mummy (1999), The Matrix, The Secret History by Donna Tartt, The Last Airbender (TV Series)

Script Level Analysis

Writer Exec

This section delivers a top-level assessment of the screenplay’s strengths and weaknesses — covering overall quality (P/C/R/HR), character development, emotional impact, thematic depth, narrative inconsistencies, and the story’s core philosophical conflict. It helps identify what’s resonating, what needs refinement, and how the script aligns with professional standards.

Screenplay Insights

Breaks down your script along various categories.

Overall Score: 7.63
Key Suggestions:
To elevate the script's craft, focus on refining pacing by tightening exposition-heavy scenes and clarifying character motivations, particularly for supporting roles like Lord Bryant and King Simeon. This will enhance emotional resonance and audience engagement, making the narrative more immersive and impactful, while ensuring smoother transitions between the modern and fantastical elements to strengthen the overall storytelling.
Story Critique

Big-picture feedback on the story’s clarity, stakes, cohesion, and engagement.

Key Suggestions:
The script effectively merges military drama with fantasy elements, creating an engaging narrative, but key improvements lie in refining pacing to avoid sluggish exposition and ensuring smoother transitions between timelines. By clarifying character motivations and integrating backstory more organically, the writer can heighten emotional stakes and maintain viewer immersion, ultimately strengthening the story's coherence and impact.
Characters

Explores the depth, clarity, and arc of the main and supporting characters.

Key Suggestions:
The character analysis reveals strong foundations for protagonists like Taylor and Peter, but opportunities exist to enhance emotional depth and arc progression across all characters. Focus on deepening backstories, such as Taylor's grief over Robin and Peter's identity crisis, to make motivations more relatable and drive narrative tension. Additionally, address Sarah's undefined role and static arcs in antagonists like King Simeon by ensuring active participation and transformation, which will improve overall script cohesion and emotional resonance from a creative standpoint.
Emotional Analysis

Breaks down the emotional journey of the audience across the script.

Key Suggestions:
To elevate the script's emotional craft, focus on integrating greater emotional diversity and modulation within each storyline to avoid audience fatigue. By adding moments of relief, character competence, and personal connections, such as humor in Taylor's interactions or proactive responses from Risa, the narrative can achieve deeper empathy and complexity. This will strengthen character arcs, enhance pacing, and ensure that high-tension scenes have more impact through contrast, making the story more engaging and resonant.
Goals and Philosophical Conflict

Evaluates character motivations, obstacles, and sources of tension throughout the plot.

Key Suggestions:
The goals_pc analysis reveals a robust framework for character development and conflict, but to elevate the script creatively, focus on deepening the philosophical conflicts by ensuring that moments of destiny versus free will are more viscerally tied to character emotions and decisions. This will enhance thematic resonance and prevent the high-resolution percentages from feeling abrupt, allowing for a more organic build-up that maintains audience investment and emotional payoff.
Themes

Analysis of the themes of the screenplay and how well they’re expressed.

Key Suggestions:
From a creative perspective, the script's strong emphasis on destiny and the chosen ones provides a solid foundation, but to elevate it, focus on deepening character emotional arcs and clarifying the blurred lines between dream and reality sequences. This will enhance audience engagement by making the mystical elements more grounded and relatable, ensuring that themes like hidden truths and self-discovery are woven seamlessly into the narrative rather than feeling expository, ultimately strengthening the overall story craft and pacing.
Logic & Inconsistencies

Highlights any contradictions, plot holes, or logic gaps that may confuse viewers.

Key Suggestions:
The script's blend of military and supernatural elements shows promise, but inconsistencies in character behavior and unclear transitions between dream and reality disrupt the narrative flow. To improve, focus on aligning characters' actions with their established traits, clarifying the dream sequences' role in the plot, and resolving plot holes to create a more cohesive and immersive story that better serves the genre's conventions.

Scene Analysis

All of your scenes analyzed individually and compared, so you can zero in on what to improve.

Scene-Level Percentile Chart
Hover over the graph to see more details about each score.
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Other Analyses

Writer Exec

This section looks at the extra spark — your story’s voice, style, world, and the moments that really stick. These insights might not change the bones of the script, but they can make it more original, more immersive, and way more memorable. It’s where things get fun, weird, and wonderfully you.

Unique Voice

Assesses the distinctiveness and personality of the writer's voice.

Key Suggestions:
The writer's voice effectively builds suspense and immersive worlds through vivid imagery and internal conflict, but to elevate the script, focus on refining transitions between dream sequences and reality to maintain clarity and prevent audience disorientation. Enhancing character arcs, particularly Taylor's psychological journey, could deepen emotional resonance and ensure the supernatural elements serve the narrative without overwhelming it, drawing from the strengths evident in scenes like the best-identified one.
Writer's Craft

Analyzes the writing to help the writer be aware of their skill and improve.

Key Suggestions:
The screenplay has a solid foundation in suspense and vivid imagery, but to enhance its creative impact, focus on infusing dialogue with deeper subtext and emotional layers, tightening pacing to sustain tension and engagement, and enriching character backstories and motivations. These improvements will make the narrative more immersive and emotionally compelling, turning good scenes into unforgettable ones.
Memorable Lines
Spotlights standout dialogue lines with emotional or thematic power.
Tropes
Highlights common or genre-specific tropes found in the script.
World Building

Evaluates the depth, consistency, and immersion of the story's world.

Key Suggestions:
The script's world-building is a strong asset, effectively blending real-world and fantastical elements to drive character development and plot, but to elevate it, focus on refining the transitions between settings—like the shifts from Turkish marketplaces to mystical realms—to maintain narrative clarity and emotional resonance. Ensuring consistent cultural and technological integrations will prevent audience confusion and deepen thematic explorations, making the story more immersive and cohesive from a craft perspective.
Correlations

Identifies patterns in scene scores.

Key Suggestions:
The analysis reveals that while the script excels in building mystery and tension, opportunities for improvement lie in integrating emotional elements earlier to bolster character development and prevent plot stagnation. By seeding personal stakes and conflicts from the outset, the writer can create a more cohesive narrative arc, ensuring that mysterious tones enhance rather than overshadow character growth, leading to deeper audience engagement and a more impactful story.
Loglines
Presents logline variations based on theme, genre, and hook.